um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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