I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize