So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize