I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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