she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
