i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
We are two peas in an std pod
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
