I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
