It's just like the Real World with babies
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
No...this little piggys going to the bar
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
