She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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