The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
