They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize