I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
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