We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
