i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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