I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
