Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.

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(425): View more from Washington

Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?

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(415): View more from California

It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.

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(248): View more from Michigan

So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.

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(561): View more from Florida

at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe

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(775): View more from Nevada

she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever

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(253): View more from Washington

Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that

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(336): View more from North Carolina

The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving

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