She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
