obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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