I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
