Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
