is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
