Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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