he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
