I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
