It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
