I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
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