Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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