I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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