Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
