Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
