i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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