Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
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