Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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