He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
