Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
