He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
