No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
