Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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