I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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