im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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