I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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