I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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