ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She's the barista slut.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
