operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I have feelings that need drinking.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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