OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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