Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
