So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Do vagina's smell?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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