just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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