Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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