I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Randomize
