College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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